What Jerking Off Has Taught Me About Self-Control

Well here's something I never thought I'd be writing about.

Jerking off.

But considering I've already told half the damn internet I sell my used underwear, I guess we're past the point of pretending I'm some respectable member of society.

Anyway.

I've been thinking about something.

When I was a younger man, jerking off was pretty straightforward.

Get the job done and get on with whatever the hell I was doing.

Didn't see much reason to complicate things.

I wasn't trying to discover myself. I wasn't looking for some great life lesson.

I was just horny.

Pretty simple.

But somewhere along the way I figured out that being in such a damn hurry to get what you want sometimes takes half the fun out of it.

That's how I discovered edging.

And before somebody asks, no, it doesn't involve a lawn mower.

It's basically learning to slow your ass down instead of always rushing straight to the finish line.

Turns out I've got a pretty impressive amount of patience when I've got the right motivation.

Wish I could say the same thing when I'm standing behind somebody at Walmart trying to figure out how to use the self-checkout.

But I got to thinking about it.

I've spent most of my adult life working construction.

When I was younger, I wanted to get everything done as fast as possible.

Finish the job. Get paid. Move on.

Took me a while to figure out that rushing through shit usually means you're gonna end up doing some of it twice.

Same thing with fishing.

You can sit there getting pissed off because nothing's biting or you can enjoy having a few hours where nobody's bothering the hell out of you.

Sometimes the waiting is part of it.

Apparently that's true for more than fishing.

Who knew?

Now I'm not saying everybody needs to start jerking off for personal development.

Although I suppose there are worse hobbies.

I'm just saying I've learned there's something to be said for not being in such a goddamn hurry all the time.

Sometimes you gotta slow down.

Enjoy yourself.

Quit worrying about getting to the end of everything.

And if you happen to learn a little self-control while you've got your dick in your hand, well hell.

At least you accomplished something today.

Don't know if any of this makes sense.

Started writing about masturbation and somehow ended up talking about construction and fishing.

Probably tells you everything you need to know about me.

Anyway.

That's what jerking off has taught me about self-control.

Grandma Arlene would probably knock me upside the head if she knew I was writing this shit.

And Tucker better not read it.

I've embarrassed that kid enough this week.

See some tools that may help you learn to edge and gain self control.

See More of What I'm up to